So often we think failure is final and that our children will lose their self-confidence if they don't succeed the first time at each thing they try.
Just like building stronger muscles requires struggling against weights that are not easy to lift, and just like babies learning to walk requires falling down and getting up, and learning to write or play an instrument or cook or build something, learning to overcome challenges requires practice ... often with failures along the way.
When we step in to make things easy for our child, to fix any problems they may encounter, we are sending them the message that we know they don't have the ability to do it themselves. THAT is what hurts their confidence.
Does that mean we should just shove them out the door into the cruel world to fend for themselves? Nope!
Guiding them through the process of handling challenges and gradually stepping further and further back to let them take on more and more of the responsibility teaches them how to pick themselves up and keep moving forward when things seem impossible.
We show them, we help them, we encourage them.
We model the qualities we want them to develop.
Our kids take their cues from what we do more than what we tell them to do.
If you treat challenges as the end of the world as we know it, as everyone doing you wrong and having an adult temper tantrum because things aren't going your way, don't be surprised if that's how your children handle adversity.
If you treat challenges as a learning opportunity, as something to step up to and overcome, and as just a part of life we all face, odds are your children will develop that same attitude of persevering with a positive attitude.
